Is there a drug addict in your life?

The Disease of Addiction
Overcoming addiction is a challenge that often requires family and friend support while in an environment such as residential rehab, intensive outpatient, counseling and group therapy.

Genetic Predisposition
The genes that people are born with, in combination with environmental influences account for about half of their addiction vulnerability. Additionally, gender, ethnicity, and the presence of other mental disorders may influence risk for drug abuse and addiction.

Healthy Boundaries
Setting boundaries with a recovering addict is the first step towards sobriety. Addicts often arrive at their current situation with very poor boundaries. Family and loved ones must not support any behavior that signals the addicts drug or alcohol abuse is acceptable, this includes providing money, food and shelter. Loved ones should let the addict know they have the support of positive behavior such as seeking help, entering rehab or meeting a counselor.

Drug abusers often try to conceal their symptoms and downplay their problem. If youre worried that a friend or family member might be abusing drugs, look for the following warning signs:

Physical warning signs of Drug Addiction

Behavioral signs of Drug Addiction

• Drop in attendance and performance at work or school
• Unexplained need for money or financial problems. May borrow or steal to get it
• Engaging in secretive or suspicious behaviors
• Sudden change in friends, favorite hangouts, and hobbies
• Frequently getting into trouble (fights, accidents, illegal activities)

Psychological warning signs of Drug Addiction

• Unexplained change in personality or attitude
• Sudden mood swings, irritability, or angry outbursts
• Periods of unusual hyperactivity, agitation, or giddiness
• Lack of motivation; appears lethargic or spaced out
• Appears fearful, anxious, or paranoid, with no reason

What role do you play in the addicts life?

When drug or alcohol addiction starts to take hold, predictable behavior patterns begin to surface among family, friends and loved ones.

Addiction throws off the normal social roles assumed in a family or social circle. In order to maintain stability, new roles will be formed or traditional roles will shift to relieve pain, restore balance and keep the family together.

These new roles can take attention away from the addict allowing the entire family to avoid facing the real problem, addiction.

How to identify enabling behaviors, are you an enabler?

• Protect others from the consequences of their own actions
• Attempt to save others from feeling intense emotional pain
• Prevent crises for troubled persons; which, in fact prolongs the problems
• Act out of a sincere, if misguided, sense of love and loyalty
• May act out of shame to protect their self-respect and that of their environment
• Are motivated by the fear that they may share the unfortunate consequences of the troubled person's problems
• Blame themselves for the troubled person's problems
• Guilt over the troubled person's problems and the troubled person's inability to solve them
• Fear that the troubled person's problems will never be solved and will ultimately consume them
• Vent a large amount of anger against the troubled person
• Make decisions for the troubled person decisions that are best left for the troubled person to make for himself

Identifying codependent behaviors, are you codependent?

• Do you feel responsible for other people's feelings, thoughts, actions, choices, health, happiness and overall sense of well-being?
• Do you mask your efforts to control people and situations as "being helpful"?
• Do you feel as if almost nothing is too much trouble, takes too much time or is too expensive if it will "hel " the person/people you are involved with?
• Do you find it easier to stand up for another, or get angry about the injustices done to another, than to stand up and fight for your own rights?
• Do you feel safest and most comfortable when you are focused on taking care of someone else?
• Do you bolster your own self-worth or self-esteem by making someone else feel good?
• Do you feel empty, bored and worthless if you don't have someone else to take care of, a problem to solve or a crisis to deal with?
• Do you stay in un-fulfilling or toxic relationships for fear that no one else will want you?
• Do you sometimes wonder if you have "sucker" written on your forehead or "doormat" on your back
• Are your thoughts and feelings more reflective of the thoughts and feelings of others around you?

Common roles played by loved ones dealing with addiction:

The Addict
The Addict uses excuses, minimizes the problem, and refuses to change their behavior. They sneak and lie about their drug use and mishandle money and other responsibilities due to their substance abuse problems.
They typically deny that they have a problem and make it sound or appear that its others who have the problems, or blame their drug or alcohol use on outside problems or people. They allow their emotions to dictate their life by trying to cover them instead of being honest about them. They havent been approached about drug rehab, or they have refused to go, or they have been before and have relapsed and are in denial.

The Enabler
The Enabler is usually the spouse or significant other, sometimes a parent or friend if there is no romantic partner. They stand by the addict helping to pick up the pieces, making more excuses, not exposing the problems in a way that can make them stop. They sometimes try to help but in ways that end up allowing the addiction to continue. Often times, the enabler is in as much denial as the addict on how bad it is and they block out all the evidence in their mind that the substance abuse is really happening.

The Hero
The Hero often fantasizes that if he or she accomplishes enough, then the whole family will be "o.k.". This child is overly conscientious, conforms to all the rules, and constantly seeks approval. In spite of being a high achiever, the hero child always feels inadequate.
They distract from the addiction by being the good face on the family by being an overachiever and being a rule follower. They are the do-gooder, but often resent this in the end. This is the person who feels they have to make the family " look good" in the eyes of others.

The Scapegoat
This is the opposite of the Hero. The family distracts by blaming the scapegoat for anything and everything. The Scapegoat becomes the black sheep of the family and takes the hit of responsibility that really belongs to the addict.
The scapegoat may get into trouble often, have a rebel or I dont care attitude, and takes attention away from the addict

The Mascot
The Mascot often distracts the family from the addiction problem by being goofy and bringing some light to the situation. They try to alleviate the pain in the family, but often go overboard.
The mascot draws attention away from the pain and dysfunction at home by being entertaining. This child is "cut ". He or she is always truly immature, but plays up the immaturity to draw attention away from the big people who are the dangerous dysfunctional addicts. Inside, this child is filled mostly with insecurity.

The Lost Child
The Lost Child will just go with the flow, dont stand out, dont make any trouble. With the antics and achievement of the other family members, the low-maintenance kid is what the addiction family needs. Unfortunately, the Lost child often stays lost long into adulthood and has a lot of trouble getting direction in their life, interacting socially, or standing up for themselves.
The lost child may spend time alone to escape the problem. They can experience social difficulties such as imaginary friends, make believe play and may be very shy.

Intervention

Intervention is a proven, successful process that has enabled thousands of addicts to receive treatment despite the fact that they have already refused to do so. Their addictions can be to alcohol and other mood altering drugs as well as to food, anorexia, gambling, Internet, sex and others.

Contrary to myth, people do not have to hit bottom in order to receive help. Sometimes that is too late. An intervention, by breaking through the denial of the addict succeeds in bringing the bottom up by creating a crisis.

Through clear, detailed, often documented information, presented in a loving, firm and supportive way the person is able to see the effect their addiction has had on everyone who is important to him/her as well as on their own lives.